What I Hope for my Daughter: Eyes to See

Abby De GrootThe CACE Roundtable7 Comments

Mother and daughter looking at sunset with hope.
Mother and Daughter looking at horizon with hope.

Diagnosis

In 2019, when my daughter Reese was in kindergarten, she was suddenly and unexpectedly diagnosed with type 1 diabetes on a Friday in March. We spent the weekend in a local children’s hospital, discharged on Sunday with an expensive pharmacy bill and a very rough understanding of how to replicate the work of our daughter’s now defunct pancreas.  On Monday, my husband and I walked into her small Christian school to meet with her principal and teachers to determine how the school, which had never served a type 1 student and had no nurse, was going to keep our six-year-old alive between 8:20 a.m. and 3:30 p.m. every day. 

This diagnosis had a major impact not only on our family but on Reese’s school. During the first week, a family member stayed at school every day to oversee finger pokes and insulin shots.  In the midst of a school year myself, I worked from the teacher’s lounge crafting online assignments for my college students in between meeting with Reese’s new team to decide on a care plan.  The school held an in-service led by a diabetic educator to help staff understand the disease and know what to do in a low blood sugar emergency. The resource teacher and I wrote a 504 plan. Reese’s kindergarten teacher read a children’s book to her class explaining her new disease to her friends. We came up with scenarios and protocols.

Response

Our work and planning during that week helped me feel confident that Reese would be safe. But more than that, my time in her school assured me that she was loved. I saw love in the tear-filled eyes of the cooks as they asked how to accommodate her. I felt love in the hugs of so many teachers, some of whom had been my own teachers when I walked those halls years before. I heard love in her principal’s voice as we discussed how hard it is to watch our kids in pain.

“I heard love in her principal’s voice as we discussed how hard it is to watch our kids in pain.”

I have continued to witness acts of love and care for Reese in the three and a half years following her diagnosis.  Teachers take care to keep snacks on hand suitable for her. The head cook sends me menus with carefully counted carbohydrates for every meal. Her friends bring her fun trinkets instead of candy on Valentines’ Day. Fellow parents text me their food plans for birthday parties. Her PE teacher makes sure Reese sits down when her blood sugar is low, even when she wants to play. The school social worker is helping her work through some of her big feelings. The whole faculty and staff listened intently as I reviewed safety information in another in-service before school this August.

Vision

I still get emotionally overwhelmed when I think back on that March 2019 week and on all of the ways Reese’s school community has held her since. As her mom and primary caregiver, the hub in the wheel of her care, I have the unique perspective of knowing and seeing all the ways that she is loved by the body of Christ.  This big-picture perspective is important. In their book Teaching and Christian Imagination, Smith and Felch (2016) ask readers to imagine an encounter with two stonecutters at work who are asked what they are doing. “One of them replies: ‘I am cutting this stone in a perfectly square shape.’ The other, apparently carrying out the same actions, says: ‘I am building a cathedral’” (p. 6). As a result of these different visions of purpose, each stonecutter experiences the work in a different way and learns different things from the same activity. Similarly, Smith and Feich say that more than techniques and strategies, Christian teachers and students need a compelling vision of what it is that they are doing.

I don’t know how each of the people loving and caring for Reese sees their actions—maybe as simply cutting stones, just doing their jobs. But I hope they can sometimes glimpse how each of these tiny acts is part of the larger calling we all share, building Reese and the other students into who they are as sanctuaries of God, magnificent cathedrals.  

“Christian teachers and students need a compelling vision of what it is that they are doing.”

Hope

Reese is now in fourth grade. My hopes for this school year are many. I hope she finds books she loves that challenge and excite her. I hope she continues to do math problems for fun, and I hope she is a good friend. However, my deepest hope for her this year is that she has eyes to see the acts of love and care she receives at school as reflections of the deep, perfect love lavished on her by her Father in Heaven.


References

Smith, D. I., & Felch, S. M. (2016). Teaching and Christian Imagination. Eerdmans.

Author

  • Dr. Abby De Groot is an assistant professor of Education at Dordt University and former high school English teacher. She and her husband Jason live in Iowa with their three precocious kids and one naughty dog. In addition to her family, friends, and work, she loves good books, stimulating conversation, and a quiet moment alone.

7 Comments on “What I Hope for my Daughter: Eyes to See”

  1. My daughter JoJo was diagnosed with T1 Diabetes in kindergarten also. The staff at Sunnyside Christian School in Sunnyside, WA were immediately immersed in her care also. I went in every day at lunch to check her blood & bolus for her lunch. Anytime there was a party, I went to school to give her a a shot, so she could eat the goodies. Thankfully the music teacher had experience with T1D & helped some. The next year, her 1st grade teacher learned how to care for her as I had to spend time with a newborn in the NICU, 3 hours away. By 2nd grade she was on an insulin pump & was able to start caring for herself (with guidance!). Now she is a freshman at Dordt. She is studying Nursing. I think she’ll be a great nurse!
    I am thankful for the “community” that gathered around to make sure her educational experience was fulfilling.

  2. Thank you so much Abby for sharing a very heart strengthening story.
    I am very inspired and blessed.

    Best regards from Indonesia

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